place i've been before

there were so many visuals,
some have got to make sense
there was a red room, a green room
and others of many colors
some were doors which led to more doors
seeming at first like dwelling quarters
but leading into brothels and opium dens
there...in this dream, in a
place i've been before.

it was like a small city

from the outside the buildings
looked like fast food chain stores
but no lights were on,
no children on playthings
and the windows were purple black
reflective tint like secret service
two way glass
names i cannot recall that mocked
mcdonaldland and kentucky eff sea

i drove up in a ninety eight
with fake gauges and a steering wheel
that fell apart like handle bars
(it made the driving away hard)
there were a couple of friends there
who i did not know, and her
as another friend
and then her girlfriend
there were also the players

they lived there all the time
they ran the boat
but they
appeared as janitorial workers that
pimped the girls there on the weekends
it was only open on the weekends
rest of the week it just existed as
a vacant and false city block
in the middle of some warehouse district
whorehouse fit for demolition
in one of many junkies' dreams

the players

at moments they were my friends
getting me drinks a sofa and a match
other times they would amuse themselves by
threatening me with shoulder launch
rockets to my mouth
laughing with them i
held back frantic tears as i
moved to slide into another room

inside
then outside

into another room where they offered me
whores
young women
one
was pale
blue pale with backward vampire teeth
crusty nipples chewed by babies and
swollen with puss
her bottom
half torn
she took me into her arms and offered her sex for
one hundred dollars
i asked her friend who looked more like me
more tired but sexy
she said no she was waiting for her boyfriend
she said she'd had no sex now for seven weeks
i offered her forty dollars to take a shower with me
and to let me eat her pussy
she said yes but then i toppled
fell into another room
her was ordering mexican food by telephone
for me for her and for her girlfriend
and for no one
who sat beside me
i listened as she said
some words i did not know in spanish
turning laughing eyes to me
then sealing the deal

the latino called to ask directions and i
canceled the order as
i would not be the center of
further games

returning from the front desk
the room was now a restaurant
people sitting motionless
dimly lit and paneling surrounded
my waitress ex lover
i told her the food is not coming
i told her there was no joke
i would not eat those chicken testicles
she screamed at me again
threw napkins balled to weapons grade
and i wished i had no sense to hear now
could only sit and watch her cry
there was so much more twisted in this
concrete garden scene, penis shaking contests
and a guy who i swear was
silent bob
only he could turn his tongue piercing
into a vagina
he took his dick in his hand and
went searching for a bottle
i left the room before the orgy came

next was a grand dining hall
valerie's mom had roasted thirty
maybe fifty different loaves of meat

it had snowed outside

getting ready for the party now
the players were gone and also
my friends
ex lovers had been frozen still and
we watched the rest of these as etchings
there was a snow plow speeder
that could carry us down the fluffy
road at rip speed
all was in place now
sitting on a porch swing
i could watch the frozen fallen
and falling
i felt just past alright
just warm enough
and a cool crisp breeze
like in one of those new style gum commercials
i had cooked pork barbecue for the guests to
eat while waiting

the party was to be tomorrow